Mixed emotions…

Posted: August 30, 2011 in growing stronger, tough times

So it’s been a while since I last blogged mainly due to the fact I have been so busy, but also due to the fact I have been rather unwell lately.

In these past few months I have been battling several medical issues but the worst one is the fact I keep having serious migraines. To start with i was just getting the odd one every now and again, which is pretty normal but lately i have been taking them nearly everyday. Not only are they more frequent they are becoming worse. Not only am I in pain with them but I have been feeling dizzy, getting stars in my eyes and feeling very light headed all of the time. I have even had to take time off of work as they have become so bad. I have been going back and forth to the doctor and every time I go I don’t seem to get anywhere. They each tell me a different thing and try me on medication to make me better. I have been going back and forth for 6 months now and still getting nowhere. I was there again the other day and yet again I didn’t really get anywhere. I got put on 2 different sets if tablets and told to come back in 2 weeks. Hopefully they will find exactly what is wrong soon and all this will be over.

Another thing that’s been keeping me busy is planning my future. I have been looking into ways of starting up my own photography business and trying to start a few things for that. I have also had a few jobs over the summer related to my photography which have been great experience for me. I have also been working full time over the summer to help raise some funds so that I can make my dreams come true.

Speaking of dreams I been thinking a lot lately about what I want to do as a career, and although photography is a huge part in my life just now and a massive passion of mine it’s not what I see me doing a few years down the line. I’ve been discussing things with a few people about what I want to do and I always come back to one thing. Social work.

It’s maybe a bit strange to hear as it’s so different from photography also from engineering which most people know was what I wanted to do when I left school. I’m a very practical minded person and I’ve always said that an “office” job ain’t for me, but as time goes on something inside me continues to get bigger telling me this is what I should do. I love the thought of getting up in the morning and thriving to go to work, also leaving work at the end of the day satisfied with what you have achieved that day. I guess in a way it’s a personal thing and I want to help as many young people that find themselves in similar situations to what I was in when I was younger. Being through so many things myself I know how much a bit of support means.

I’ve got a long way to go to achieve my dream and I know that there may be a few obstacles in my way but the fight in me to do this should be enough to make me achieve everything I want.

I guess the bit of me that wants this has made me do some of the things I do now, like help people that are struggling and try my best to be a positive role model in as many peoples life as I can be. Some of the people I am supporting at the moment help me focus on this and allow me to believe I am capable of achieving this. Just the other day one of the young girls I help told me that without me in her life she wouldn’t know how to cope. She even referred to me as the big sister she has never had. This really touched me and has added to the fire burning for this dream to come true.

There’s a few other things going on in my mind but these are the most important ones and hopefully in a few months I will have began my journey to achieve my dream.

Do you think I will achieve my dream and make a good social worker?

That’s all the thoughts I have just now.
Bye for now 🙂

  1. Linda says:

    I know you can do it! So live the dream Hayley it’s what I want for you. X x

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